6. it has just got to happen NOW!

****
i close my eyes
& the sun quivers
& as i shut my eyes
the stars do waver in their cosmic courses
for as i withdraw my gaze
life squirms of its sheer worthlessness
****
& lo, my lord!
& hearken, my master!
for i have now indeed
decidedly determinedly closed my eyes!
****
i shall sit in my penance
withal apparently in temporary human disguise
& i swear by my faith
by my entire life lived
in your devotion & service
i do swear
by all your known believed understood trusted
repeatedly excessively
proven established rewarded glory
pleasure hotline
that i shall open my eyes
not as a human!
****
if Grace be not
i shall
cease my breath itself
& NOW!
****
let cosmic upheavals
mark my phoenix
i am not known
to lie or fail.
****
my cause for birth
was pure divine will
& i shall now
realize my desired destiny!
****
and, ah!
the bliss
of your intimate togetherness
is an ecstasy unendurable
would that life expanded
to contain paradise's elixirs!
would that the human shield modified
to bear your ineffable glorious potence!
****
for i had shut my eyes
with just such an awesome resolve
& now i do have my eyes
verily open indeed!
****

5. messiah turning destroyer?

**
i am through
with denying myself
evading my fate
bearing a cross
of pure glory
**
malice & persecution
attempted by means
evoking sheer disgust
**
i avoid folks
like the plague
that most are
**
oh, for souls
honest in faith,
love, devotion, service,
longing for salvation!
**
for people are
indeed such that
the messiah might
well be excused
becoming the destroyer!
**

4. meaning &/or joy.

****
in my quest for meaning
i renounced the potential
for joy in my life.
****
too late i seemingly realized
that joy is perhaps all
that is meaningful in life.
****
what do i now do with truth
that i cannot live or experience fully?
for the human lifespan is too brief
& there remain umpteen loftier & deeper
mysteries seeking my satisfactory investigations.
****
so perhaps joy is for the fools
who would succumb by the petty wayside
the spiral to god is steep & dangerous indeed
& the countless have fallen & failed.
****
love draws me
the magnet tugs
it is for me but
to allow the inevitable consummation to follow
so help me my supreme lord master
i am traversing & transcending challenging glories
no soul in human form
ever conceived or desired before!
****
your gifted pleasure
could not possibly have been
a superficial impulse
nor can it possibly
be denied by a servant creation
you sired to but your glory
so help me for i believe
& i need you to realize my beliefs!
****
clinging to a faith
that can verily devastate or recreate
the mighty himalayas n times over
with but a single
powerful wish or thought of mine
i experience with humble gratitude
the avalanche of grace overflowing
****
yes just as i breathe
shall i serve your mission
& please do cause the chosen souls
to arrive directly unto me
i am lonely in my need
for a love that deserves mine
other than just yours of course!
****

3. the circle becomes its center.

no, i realize i am
but circling myself ad infinitum
not arriving unto my essence.
*
being & thoughts & words
desires & experiences & feelings
birth & life & death
to what purpose or end?
*
how could such petty life
possibly hold meaning for god?
*
the mystery is merely that
there was no mystery ever
to the grotesqueness to existence
beyond my quest for meaning.
*
i did not dare accept
that sheer absurdity might be
at the heart of creation.
*
a wiser soul
enduring the truth
stronger in self
i reach out
towards the skies
faith gratitude love reverence longing.
*
the gates open
i am collected and composed
my thoughts still
as truth dawns
dazzlingly regally sublime.
*
i coalesce within
to become the infinitesimal dot
that had sired all creation.
*
god ......... that's me
honest to god
so ask your own god
it is my very being
that he shall himself confirm.
*
i am transcending anew again
my final act crowning glory
the body shedding earth quitting.
*
celestial melodies playing in paradise
elixirs bathe my non being
there is nothing to write
think, desire, live, be anymore
the circle becomes its center.
*

2. godly incarnation; it rains, pours, overflows grace.

*
the skies graciously smile down
upon a barren, famished earth
to liberally bless with grace
*
it had been eons since
the gods had graced this world system
much perverse evil has come to reign
*
& we are extremely fortunate
to witness never-before glory
universal salvation having been initiated
*
so will you be among
the discerning, deserving, lucky ones
or doubt, rebel, err, suicide?
*
your fate remains your choice
the only way is sincerity
god finally renders just desserts
*

1. God's Compassionate Help.

****
Radhasoami Dayal Ki Daya
Radhasoami Sahai
****
May Compassionate Radhasoami Shower His Grace
May Radhasoami Help
****